Today in Wetsminster

Incarceration Tsar Gray Quisling told Parliament today that after a visit to Australia’s prison centre of excellence, Cell Block H that he was to institute a book ban for all naughty people.

Prison Officer

I’d throw the book at you, sonny Jim.

Struggling to be heard over the cheers as the awards for Eton’s top 100 FAG Masters were read out at the opposite end of the chamber, the enslavement expert continued undeterred. He informed the MPS that two people, Mr and Mrs Teddington, had attended his surgery in Penge over the past year and they were very concerned that some bad people were learning information. “You can’t ignore that kind of concern.” he stated. “This is why I have put into place a ban on any bad person in all the United Britain’s jails from being able to read words.”
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